Is Brit Going Home?
I may be dangling on a limb here, but is Becca too sensible to be on this show?
I’ve always thought the Bachelor was my guilty pleasure, but my friend Carol said it is more than that. It’s a teaching tool. Her daughter Olivia can witness how not to act and benefit from the mistakes other women make without making them herself.
So because of Carol and Olivia, I am routing whole-heatedly for Becca. I can’t even call her the closet-virgin, because she’s even too logical for that. She’s simply a virgin. Doesn’t care what anyone thinks. Hasn’t met the right man. And Athletchic believes that is more wholesome than 95% of the prime time shows.
Here’s what happened on day two of the two-parter:
Becca’s One-on-One Date Left Over from Sunday Night
We had to do a double take when Becca jumped at Chris and wrapped her arms and legs around him. It seemed unlike her. But we loved it.
Chris takes Becca to his loft apartment, and Becca admits she’s never been in love. She dated one guy off and on for four years but knew he wouldn’t be the father of her children. (It just gets better and better with her.) They chat, hug on the rooftop and Becca doesn’t want it to end. Their silhouette betrays their kiss in the rays of the setting sun.
Back at the ranch, life is much more dramatic. Brit gives the other girls a sob story that she is going home before the rose ceremony. They don’t buy it and ask for sure? Yes for sure. You’re set on that then? Well probably for sure. So you won’t change your mind? Well I don’t think so but maybe for sure. She says she feels like they are harassing her, and then performs a cry, cry, cry routine that clearly says–doesn’t anyone feel sorry for me?
Nope. We’ve got your number
The girls get ready for the rose ceremony and Brit gets all guzzied up in her best dress yet to go home. Then, Chris Harrison announces there isn’t going to be a rose ceremony. AWESOME!!! Brit nearly passes out. (No cab yet?)
The Rose Ceremony
Chris begins talking. Brit interrupts. The two of them leave. The girls congregate and say they knew Brit would try and talk herself back into the picture.
Brit apologizes. Chris says her behavior was disrespectful and that the other girls say she’s lying. Brit asks if it was Carly. It doesn’t matter, he says. But yes it was Carly. She squeezes it out of him. (No backbone.) They go back and forth and then Chris does it; he sends her home. (Go Chri-is; go Chri-is.) Shell-shocked Brit’s black mascara runs down her face, and she ends up outside crying as loud as she can in the hope that Chris will come after her.
He doesn’t. (Woohoo!) And eventually her whaling dies out.
No time for celebration because the ceremony continues. Kaitlyn already has a rose, and Chris hands out three more roses to Whitney, Becca, Jade and Carly goes home. (It could have been worse. You could have walked out with Brit.) Then we are on to meet the families.
Becca’s Home Town Date in Shreveport, LA
Chris is the first guy she’s ever brought home to meet her family. He’s nervous but fits in early on. We get the feeling all is well until Becca’s sister takes Chris away and tells him Becca isn’t an intimate person. She’s never had the urge to be close to a man. She’s concerned. Then Chris becomes concerned. (Nice going sis.)
The interview with Mom is better. She says she’s never seen Becca like this. They are a family and if one hurts they all hurt and if one loves, they all love. Then she tells him not to break her daughter’s heart. Be sweet. And Chris says it would be great to be the guy that Becca’s been waiting for. (Hmmm, not sure I liked the way that came out.)
After the family visit, Chris surprises Becca and takes her on a private Ferris wheel. Becca says it is the best day ever and even though she has never been in love, she wonders if this feeling she is having is the beginning of love. She says if this works out between her and Chris, she may look back on this day and say I think that was the day I fell in love. (Awww, sweet.) Then we are off to the next family.
Hit the Mute Button It’s Whitney’s Chicago Home Town Date
Right off the bat Whitney asks if he would like to make a baby. (Homerun.) She takes him to the fertility clinic. They change and Chris looks like a doofus in scrubs, but Whitney thinks he’s sexy.
They watch with fascination as a sperm is interjected into an egg, and Chris mentions that Whitney makes babies and he makes corn. He’s impressed with her job. But then the fun Whitney comes out and she takes Chris to the man room where dozens of Play boy books intend to help men along when they are donating sperm. (Any Jade issues?) They offer a male specimen jar to him, and Whitney teases they can test Chris’s sperm. Chris says he’s pretty sure his soldiers are marching.
At the home visit, Uncle John describes Whitney as vulnerable and strong. Chris agrees. Whitney talks to her sister, Kim, and says her feelings for Chris are real. Her sister asks if she could live away from her family in such a small town. Whitney asks for her sister’s approval, but she won’t give it without knowing for sure that Chris loves her. Whitney cries. Mentions her mom. Then Chris asks Kim for her blessing if he wants to marry her. (We like Whitney but this scares us for our front runner. Hopefully they’re attempting a throw-off.)Kim says, eh call back once you’re sure.
Once alone, Whitney says she’s fallen in love with Chris. She cries. (Was he crying again? We couldn’t look.) And the date with squeaky voice comes to a close.
Kaitlyn’s Home Town Visit
It starts by the dumpster. (Freudian?) But quickly moves to a recording studio where Kaitlyn and Chris write and record their own rap. Kaitlyn does awesome. Chris doesn’t.
They head to meet the family—parents, steps, and sister. We miss a little of her conversation marveling over the fire-pit, stone dinner table. (Did you see that thing?) She tells her mother she hearts him. (OMG.) The conversation gets a little weepy and we start to like Kaitlyn. She’s a little vulnerable. W didn’t expect that. Then she ruins it by walking Chris outside to a lit up bill board that has her name, Kaitlyn, a heart and Chris.
The Much Awaited Sweet Jade’s Home Town in Cary/Gary Nebraska
They go right to her house. Chris awkwardly gives Jade a Star’s football jacket from his high school. (Sounded like a good idea.) Chris talks to dad. He admits he’s falling in love with Jade. Dad says a lot of her boyfriends say she’s too much for them. He wants Jade to be able to live free but be loved. Chris is confused and thinks her dad is hinting about a different Jade. So he talks to her brother, who says Jade is a wild mustang, free spirit. (W..w..what?)
Jade and her dad talk. Jade says she’s changed. Chris’s right for her. She cries. Dad cries. They hug. He trusts her heart. And she knows she has to tell Chris she’s a bunny.
Finally, she gets him alone and slowly tells him. Chris keeps a straight face but stays quiet. He twitches a little. Then she asks if he wants to see the pics (awkward) and brings them up on the computer. Chris doesn’t know whether to look. He feels it’s inappropriate. We hear a clip with her talking. There’s a video. (Is she seriously showing him this?)
So much for sweet, innocent Jade. Chris blushes, twitches again and doesn’t know what to say. He talks up some cockamamie story that she’s who she is. He respects her and blah, blah. He saw a lot about her today. (No kidding.) They kiss. He says her nudie-pie pics are not a deal breaker. She can still be a good mother. If she’s his soul mate, he’ll stand by her no matter what’s on the internet. (Oy vey.) She’s relieved.
The Rose Ceremony
(Frankly we’re just glad their having one.)
He picks Whitney, Kaitlyn and then it’s down to the bunny or the closet virgin. (OMG!!!) He keeps sweet Becca and we collapse back on the couch. Then we watch Jade leave. Chris says it’s not the nudie pics and he’s not even sure he is making the right decision. He cries. She cries. We can’t figure out who cries more, but we are happy. Becca has survived.
They end the show with a clip of Whitney and Chris chatting on a couch and Whitney’s dog, well
Making whoopee with a toy. (Really? You saved this for last?)
So, there are many lessons learned by Olivia tonight. First, just because you are drop-dead gorgeous like Brit (and Olivia is) never get caught up in yourself and lie. Be truthful. Second, don’t relish in someone else’s misfortune, like Carly did. And thirdly, never, ever, ever take your clothes off in front of a camera.
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_________________________________________________________________________ Cyndie Zahner is a free lance writer. Follow her on Twitter at @tweetyz or on Instagram as athletchicz.