Reality Recap – Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – Season 5, Episode 17 – #RHOBH

Amster-DAMN Slap

Stuff actually happened in last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and it was very entertaining. Last week the girls left their luxurious lives in Beverly Hills to travel to Amsterdam to visit Yolanda’s home country. Last night’s episode was part 2 of the girls trip. Here are the three most important things that happened last night.

The dinner boat from hell

Wow was this interesting. After a day in bed, Yolanda plans a nice dinner for the girls on a boat that rides through town. The scenery is beautiful, the girls all look stunning, but we all know with this crew that nothing goes as planned. The girls all get onto the boat and immediately there is a weird vibe. Eileen and Kyle are still confused as to why the Lisa’s went shopping earlier in the day with Brandi and Kim, the day after Kim lashed out on Lisa Rinna and Eileen. (We find out that both Lisa’s decide they are going to just act like everything is ok to get through the trip. Eileen and Kyle aren’t about that life.) Brandi is giving Kyle weird looks. Kim won’t look at Kyle at all. Poor Yolanda has just gotten out of bed and really has no clue what is going on.

With the tension at an all-time high, Kyle excuses herself from the table. Yolanda notices and follows. Lisa Vanderpump shortly after. The three talk about Brandi giving Kyle dirty looks.

Back at the table, Eileen wants to clear the air by apologizing to Kim about how she handled questioning her sobriety. In the process of apologizing Brandi confronts Eileen about calling her an alcoholic. Eileen says that she never called Brandi an alcoholic but rather said that Brandi is mean when she drinks. (TRUE!) Brandi claims that no one has ever said that of her before. (YEAH RIGHT!) She then says that she heard Eileen was talking about her. Kim backs her up, bringing up the fact that Eileen talked about Brandi when they were at lunch with Kyle. Kyle, Lisa and Yolanda come back to the table. They all wonder what they have just walked in on. Lisa Rinna sits there saying nothing. She explained to Eileen earlier that she has Eileen’s back but she will not say anything to Kim and Brandi because you can’t reason with people who are crazy. (Makes sense.) Kim and Brandi are clearly deflecting.

“You know Kim, sue me for giving a damn!” Eileen says to Kim, fed up with Kim misunderstanding her apology. (This is why I really love Eileen. She stands up for what she believes in and her beliefs are do the right thing. She cares for Kim and isn’t sitting around ignoring it. She also knows she is not wrong here. A SANE HOUSEWIFE! AHHH!!!)

Yolanda tells Kim that Eileen is coming from a genuine place. Kim and Brandi ignore that and continue to fight. Brandi starts becoming irrational saying things like, “We don’t bring up your sleeping with half of LA (points to Lisa Vanderpump), your taking too many pills (points to Kim), my drinking to much (points to herself), your being too bossy (points to Yolanda), your not eating (points to Lisa Rinna), your being a home wrecker (points to Eileen).”

The ridiculous comments stopped there as all the women came to Eileen’s defense. (Does Brandi just try to start a fight to stay relevant, to stay on the show?!? Or does she just like fighting? Does she love ruining a good time? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS WOMAN?!?!)

The fight continues with Brandi, Kim and Kyle. The other four girls leave the table to go have dinner. They are done.

The girls create a positivity circle

Amidst all the negativity that has gone on while in Amsterdam, Brandi actually comes up with a good idea and tries to change the vibe of the trip. She asks that the girls go around the table and say something positive about everyone there. Lisa Rinna was instantly excited and said she was thinking the same thing. The girls start with Eileen. They go around the table each saying something nice about her.

Although Brandi came up with the idea, her positive statements on everyone there were very superficial:

  • Eileen has nice eyes.
  • Yolanda has a great waist line.
  • Lisa Vanderpump has nice boobs.
  • Kyle’s hair is beautiful.

The girls call her out on the fact that Brandi is only pointing out on the surface things.

When they finally get to Brandi, who is the last person, she gets up and leaves the table saying she doesn’t want to hear what everyone has to say about her. (Brandi they have to say something positive! They aren’t going to attack you.) Here we find a very fragile Brandi. Just as Lisa Rinna says, Brandi acts tough on the surface but underneath is a very broken person.

The girls finally get Brandi back to the table and everyone digs deep and finds something nice to say to her.

Brandi slapped Lisa Vanderpump

I know the image of Lisa Vanderpump getting smacked across the face is unbelievable but believe it people. Brandi smacked the poor woman. The two were getting off the boat and Brandi was joking around with Lisa. She was trying to kiss Lisa and Vanderpump refused. The two were laughing and joking around. Next thing you know, Brandi smacks Lisa (jokingly) across the face. Brandi thought it was funny, she was trying to be playful. An older Lisa Vanderpump was not amused by it. She was pissed!

Next week on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills…We see Brandi giving Lisa Vanderpump flowers in attempt to make up with her. Vanderpump seems to be done with Brandi. Lisa Rinna sits down with Kyle to let her know that Brandi is worried about Kim. Kyle asks why Brandi doesn’t tell Kim that. Kim and Kyle sit down and Kyle gets real about things that Brandi has been saying behind Kim’s back. Kim doesn’t want to believe it. Brandi is throwing a tantrum while getting some kind of facial, telling Yolanda that she is judged by the girls everytime she says anything.

This episode looks really interesting and totally drama-filled.

So until next week…


Jessie Zahner is the owner of You can follow her on Instagram (Athletchic) or on Twitter at @Athletchic.

Reality Recap – Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – Season 5, Episode 15 – #RHOBH

3 Things That Happened Last Night on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

1. The girls go on a scavenger hunt.

Yolanda plans a scavenger hunt for the girls around Beverly Hills. She creates t-shirts for each team that say, “Dream Team #1, Dream Team #2 and Dream Team #3.” (She still feels bad about the dinner last year where she put a heart on the name cards and told the girls that whoever had a heart on their card was part of the ‘Dream Team’ leaving several girls out of it. That was really rude and so unlike Yolanda. She realizes that and is trying to make up for it.) Yolanda picks team captains: Kyle, Eileen and herself. The guys who set up the scavenger hunt draw names from a hat to see who will be on each team. They choose a name for Kyle first.

 “Brandi,” the man says. (You have got to be kidding me. There are six names in a hat and for Kyle you just happen to pick out Brandi?! I am thinking this is a set up.)

The teams finished as:

Dream Team #1 – Kyle, Brandi, Camille. (Yes, Camille is back! But just for today. Boo! I love her and wish she was still on the show!)

Dream Team #2 – Eileen, Kim, Lynn. (Lynn is just some random lady.) “I don’t like Eileen. But I don’t dislike Eileen,” Kim confesses to us. (Eileen is great Kim. Maybe she is worried about you. She is a good friend. Grow up!)

 Dream Team #3 – Yolanda, Lisa Vanderpump, Lisa Rinna. (This is my dream team. Like seriously, can I join this team?!)

The girls run around Beverly Hills doing several different tasks. Brandi and Kyle actually make it through the entire thing without fighting. Lisa Vanderpump hops on the back of a bike to hitch a ride and gets a penalty. Kim complains the entire time about her knees. Lisa Rinna, Lisa Vanderpump and Yolanda hop on a tour bus and catch a ride. Yolanda yells at her teammates to drink a milkshake because they wanted a chocolate one and she doesn’t like chocolate shakes. (Who doesn’t like chocolate shakes?!) Dream Team #2 wins 1st place. Dream Team #1 wins 2nd place. Dream Team #3 wins third.

While at Villa Blanca, their final destination, the girls are presented with medals, they have lunch and Yolanda reveals where they are going on vacation! (That must have been weird for Camille and Lynn who were not invited on the trip.)

2. The girls attend a David Foster Foundation Event.

The first stop on the trip is Calgary where Yolanda’s husband is holding an event for his charity, The David Foster Foundation. Yolanda, Kyle, Kim, Lisa Rinna and Brandi all board a private plane (with Babyface on it). While on the plane Kim feels it is the right time to call Lisa Rinna out on her recent concern for her sobriety. Kim yells at Lisa telling her to mind her own business. Kim says that she has been sober and taking one pain pill that didn’t sit right with her didn’t mean she fell off the wagon. Lisa Rinna was shocked. She was genuinely concerned about Kim. Her husband, Harry, watched his two brothers die because of alcohol addiction. Harry has been sober for three years because of it. Lisa was genuinely concerned about Kim. You may be asking yourself, “Where is this anger towards Lisa coming from?” You won’t be surprised: Brandi! Yep! Brandi told Kim that Lisa Rinna has been talking about her sobriety. Brandi said that she wanted to tell Kim before they went on the trip with the girls because Kim should know what the girls are saying about her. (BRANDI ARE YOU AN IDIOT?! LISA RINNA IS TRYING TO BE NICE! SHE IS TRYING TO BE A GOOD FRIEND! SHE IS GENUINELY CONCERNED ABOUT KIM! WHY ARE YOU STARTING SHIT?) Kyle was very embarrassed by all of this as there were others on the plane.

The girls finally get to the event. They are all dressed beautifully, David has many musicians performing, Kyle gets on stage and dances with Steven Tyler from Aerosmith, Steven Tyler kisses Kyle on stage (nothing exciting) and David raised $8.2 million for his charity!

3. The girls go to Amsterdam.

The next day the girls head to Amsterdam for their trip! “Home Sweet Home,” Yolanda says as they arrive to the airport. Kyle leaves a bag full of jewelry behind and holds the girls up while going back to look for it. She finds it (thank God) and the girls head out of the airport. While on an escalator trying to leave Kim’s luggage gets stuck at the top and the girls all run into each other. It actually looks like it hurts. Brandi and Kim both kind of squeeze out. Some lady comes to try to help. Yolanda comes over and takes care of business. “I can’t take you guys anywhere,” she says jokingly. She is really happy to have them there.

The girls are loading their stuff into the van and someone makes a comment about the escalator. Kyle mentions something about Kim’s luggage getting stuck. Kim hears this and loses it. She yells at Kyle saying that all the girls had to wait “an hour and a half” for her. She goes on to say that Kyle always gives Kim shit when she is late but no one says anything to Kyle. Kyle has no idea what is going on. She has no idea where this is coming from. She gets on the bus and sits next to Lisa Rinna. Both girls look confused. Lisa says that if everyone keeps letting Kim act this way she will continue to act like that. “She’s mean,” Lisa Rinna says of Kim.

Next time on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills…(This one looks like a good one!) The girls are in Amsterdam. Lisa Vanderpump and Eileen finally make it. We see Lisa Vanderpump riding a bike.  Later Brandi says, “You guys are the biggest f&$^ing hypocrites of all-time!” (I wonder what that is about?!) Over dinner, Lisa Rinna gets into a serious, SERIOUS, fight with Kim. (This is so unlike Lisa Rinna so someone must have really stirred the pot because this woman is awesome! She is so sweet and my new fav housewife.) Lisa is standing at the dinner table screaming, “Don’t touch my husband ever!” (It looks like she is saying it to Kim.) “Never go after my husband!” She yells again, standing, looking like she is going to throw or hit something. Kyle runs out of the room. (It looks like she is running for help.) This next episode actually looks really good. I can’t wait! (Go Lisa Rinna!)

So until next time…


Jessie Zahner is the owner of You can follow her on Instagram (Athletchic) or on Twitter at @Athletchic.


Reality Recap – Real Housewives of Beverly Hills– Season 5, Episode 12 – #RHOBH

Drama Queens

The episode starts with Kyle in her store in Beverly Hills with some of her gay friends who she is planning a mixer with. Her party planners come to meet with her and talk about what drinks they will have, an ice breaker game they will play and etc.

In Malibu, Yolanda and one of her employees are packing for her trip to Italy for husband, David Foster’s charity event. (This segment of the show is so uneventful. I like Yolanda but she is extremely boring and I wonder how she stays on the show. Probably because her model daughter, Gigi, is blowing up.)

Over at Villa Rosa, Lisa and Ken are looking at pictures of Max as a baby. Adopted son, Max, has come to Lisa asking to find out about his heritage. In this scene we see Lisa struggling with conflicted thoughts about Max finding out about his family background. She cries in the confessional as she talks about the fear that Max will leave to be with his birth parents but also wanting to be a good adoptive parent. Wanting to allow her son to be able to know more about his background. She doesn’t want to hold him back.

Next we see Brandi and Kim on a couch talking about the fight at Poker Night. This scene flashes back to portions of a conversation that Kim was having with Kyle the day before. Kim talks to Brandi, and Kyle the day before, explaining that she coughed and something snapped. She was in so much pain that she was taken to the hospital. Turns out Kim had a hernia and a cracked and fractured rib. She says she doesn’t remember everything that happened that night because her ex-husband gave her a pain pill so that she could go to the party.

Kyle says that she is not happy that Kim ruined her three years of sobriety but was happy that Kim was at least aware and acknowledging that she made a mistake.

Brandi said she knew that Kim was not right that night. She then tells Kim that it was not a good night for Kim, for herself or for Kyle. She talked about her and Kyle both drinking too much. Brandi then told Kim she was trying to protect her from her sister. (This is where things get weird. I almost feel like Brandi is trying to take advantage of Kim here. She is removing Kim from her strong family so that she can manipulate her into doing things Brandi needs.) Brandi continues to say, “You were better off with me than her.” Kim ends this scene by telling Brandi that she should go get her gay friend, Mark and the three of them should head to Kyle’s gay mixer to break the ice. Brandi agrees to go.

The party starts and everyone is there except Kim and un-invited Brandi. Everyone is having a great time playing a game in which you have the name of a famous person on your back and everyone has to give you hints until you guess who it is. Next thing you know, Kim walks in WITH BRANDI. “This is really akward. This is really weird. Brandi is here.” Kyle says with a look of surprise on her face. She let’s others around her know that she did not invite Brandi. Kim comes over to greet Kyle. Kim tells Kyle she thought inviting Brandi would be a good way to break the ice. Kyle says she was surprised and that Kim could have given her some sort of warning, like a text. Kyle tells Kim that she needs some time to gather her thoughts.

Kyle walks over to Brandi and Kim to say hello. Kyle is really being nice. She apologizes to Brandi for pushing her hand down but explains that she shouldn’t try to get between two sisters. Brandi says Kyle should never have touched her. Kyle again explains the situation and then they get into it.

Kyle explains that Brandi doesn’t know the four decades of history that goes into her relationship with Kim. Brandi responds by saying she accepts her apology but she does know the history between the two. Kyle reminds her that they have only been friends for six months so there is no way that is true.

Brandi, like last episode, again blames Kyle for not helping when she called about Kim one night. Kyle says if Brandi was such a good friend she wouldn’t announce this to everyone all the time, she would keep it to herself to protect Kim. Kyle asks Brandi to tell her what Kyle and Kim talk about if she knows so much about their relationship. Kim then gets angry because she feels like that is private material. (I am honestly so confused on why Kim is mad here.)

Finally Kyle has had it, “Are you out of your f***ing mind? How dare you have the balls to walk in here uninvited and talk to me like that!”

“You invited me and you invited Mark,” says a completely ignorant Brandi.

“When did I invite you?” Kyle says angrily.

Brandi talks about the time about a week ago when they were downtown in Kyle’s store with Lisa Rinna and she invited her. (Brandi, since then you have tried to get between the two sisters. You have infuriated and got into a physical fight with Kyle. I would say anyone with common sense would not show up after that.)

“I am sorry. I thought you were coming to be nice and I came to apologize.” Kyle says to Brandi.

Kim lashes out and tells Kyle she came over to start something.

Brandi goes off on Kyle. Gets in her face. Tells her to back up because she is the kind of girl who would fight her.

Kyle doesn’t understand why Kim is letting this go on with Brandi and she lets her know it. Kim can’t take it and says don’t put me in the middle of it and begins to cry. She sits down at a table, yelling back at Kyle. Kyle tries to talk to her and asks Brandi to leave. Brandi refuses and said she came with Kim and she is leaving with her.

“You’re not wanted.” Kyle says looking up at Brandi.

“Excuse me, neither are you. Ask your husband.” Brandi jabs back (like the piece of trash she is).

“Why are you doing this?” Kyle asks Kim. Kyle explains to Kim that they just spoke the day before about all of this.

Kim, not all there, responds, “It was this morning.”

“NO! IT WAS YESTERDAY!” Kyle screams back at her completely worried that her sister is not even aware of what day it is.

Kyle asks Kim if she is really going to let Brandi get between them. (After Kim said that Kyle was her best friend and no one could tear them apart just one day before this.)

“Ok Kim. F*** you!” Kyle storms out.

To be continued….

Next time – We see Kyle with Lisa V, Lisa R and Eileen in the aftermath of her fight with Brandi. Yolanda gives Brandi advice. Brandi lashes back (like the abuser she is) and brings up Bella’s DUI. And Kyle and Kim sit down to talk about the fight.


Jessie Zahner is the owner of You can follow her on Instagram (Athletchic) or on Twitter at @Athletchic.